| Road To Nowhere |
I just came back from my 3 day Canada trip yesterday. I love how much it absolutely sucked. =.= My mom spent over 300$ on the trip when originally we were told it was to be 150-200$. I ended up having no money to buy the stuff I wanted to buy or even money for food. In the end Lily's mom was nice enough to share the food that they bought with me. That's how my vacations go. Sadistic shit ain't it? The trip costed so much money and overall I didn't get to do anything, we spend a good amount of those days just traveling places. I spent the last 3 days staring out the window of our moving bus thinking over on what I should do with my life. Along with the music blasting in my ear to remind me in a crowd of hundreds of people I can yet still feel alone. I didn't bother talking to Lily because when I did, it gave me a negative feeling. I gave her the short story though, I wasn't happy not one bit. The good thing we went on this trip is that it helped me realize some things. Those 3 days of pondering over my life gave me a good time to think. I think its bout time I got off this dam road now.
My choices of friends aren't that great nowadays. The second I stepped into my house last night the fireworks went off. My dad started telling me about how while I was gone the neighbors complained about last week when everyone was over at my house. How they think I'm hanging around with crappy friends which therefore makes me a crappy girl. How they think I'm a slut because of the crowds of guys that magically appear at my door without me realizing it. How retarded of a friend I could have, when he asked my neighbor for a cigarette. My. FUCKING. neighbor. I think I'm going to stop now. It's all fun and games and I do enjoy it but what happens in the future? What happens when I'm in tight shit and all they can do is mutter those words "its okay". I like these guys and all but what happens when I'm left alone with the burden of everything on my back and I can't turn to any of them? I can't tell which one of them is true to me or not, I can't tell at all. I think I need to get back to my old friends now. I have been shutting them out lately and haven't given them the time or the day. I miss them as they miss me. Being on the phone with a few of them yesterday night reminded me that. Hopefully it's not too late to reconcile without having any glitches between us(:
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Name: Tifae
Located: New York, United States
Nationality: Taiwanese
DOB: September 04th, 1993
About Me: Click
Here
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Love is never easy, we begin by loving the people we can. But it is not long before we find that what we love is other then ourselves, and that our love in no protection against being wounded. Do we then seek to dominate what we love, to make it bend to our will, to stop it from hurting us, even though to do so is to betray love?
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posted by Tifae at 